Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

What did the korean guy order at the deli? A sandwich

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

I like to thumb up my own jokes.

A man walks into a Bar, and he gets kicked out because its an animal only bar no people allowed

A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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