How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

minorities

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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