In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt.

-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

One muffin says to the other muffin "it sure is hot in here." the other muffin replies "you know, technically, we're not muffins because we're not done cooking yet."

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

1d

what is the color of a burp burple

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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