Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he’d rather be road kill, than be in the KFC right across the street,inside a kids meal,dead.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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mark is religion

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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Do you knpow why Michael Jackson is not dead? Dumbass, he IS dead...

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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How many republicans does it take to raise the debt ceiling? Technically, none, as the president has the right to do this based on the 14th amendment.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

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A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

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How can you tell if a joke is skept? Tell it to raysean and see if he laughs

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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Laugh.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops