What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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