Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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