- Anti Joke

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Guy A: Why is 6 scared of 7? Guy B: Because 7, 8, 9? Guy A: No, numbers don't have feelings Guy C: That's so dumb Guy A: Hey you know what, this is an A and B conversation so... Guy C: So C your way out? Guy D: Yeah, before D and E come and F U up! Guy E: Are you guys high or something? Guy F: Dude, I'm a girl, F stand for female (Author): Oops sorry Girl F: Thanks Guy G: Mind Blown O_O

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

the game

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

Q: Why did the boy not laugh at the Anti Joke? A: Because he has no sense of humor

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.