Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

Gretta has five legs? -no

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

Knock knock Shut up

Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

"What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights." *Your suggestion is contradictory considering the fact that you are implying "Women's rights" is more humorous than "Women's rights".

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

A fat man walked into a hot dog.

Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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