Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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How do you end a sentence

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What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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