420

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar... They then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, harmony and understanding between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, they truly can coexist, and decide to pursue peace among one another and the rest of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black man walking home in the dark after a long day at work? His name you racist

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do u call a black man in the middle of a crowd of white men? A rare sighting of a black man trying to go to colledge.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A flight attendant walks up to a black man on a plane. She then asks if he would like anything to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops