- Anti Joke

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

watch a i d s left

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did priences Dian cross the street? Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt!!

Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.