Yo mama is so fat, Dora couldn't explore her. Yo mama is so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super bowl. Yo mama so hairy, Bigfoot took her picture and screamed he was gonna be a millionare.

A man named Carl walks into a bar and sees another man named Ed who has purple skin and is holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other. Carl approaches Ed and asks, "Why is your skin purple and why are you holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other?" Ed replies stating, "Well its actually a pretty funny story. I was sailing near cape cod and a saw a large whale jump out of the water, and that gave me a really good idea. So I sailed home immediately and wrote a very detailed novel about my days in Vietnam. The book was a success and I was able to make a large amount of money. However, unfortunately I became addicted to cocaine and wasted all of my money and had to live on the streets. Since then, I have cleaned up my act and am working again and have a house. I decided to treat myself to a night out and so I came here and painted myself purple. Then, I found this chinchilla and policeman's helmet on the floor and decided to hold onto it until I find the owner. Now that I think about it, that story isn't very funny. I apologize." Carl then accepted the apology and the two had a drink together and are still good friends today.

Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

Person One: Knock Knock Person Two: Whos there? Person One: You can see its obviously me because theres not really a door there.

oh hai

Is your refrigerator running? If so, it sounds like you've got a well manufactured, correctly working appliance. If not, you might want to either have a technician come over and look at it or you should simply replace it with a working one.

What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

Q. Why did the black man not get on the boat A. Because he gets seasick

Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

What's racecar spelled backwards? Jesus.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

i had sex.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: he was sucidal because his kids hate him and his wife cheated on him.

What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? (Other): "Because the P is silent." Because they're extinct.

Bob: What's red and goes ding-a-ling? Trudy: A red ding-a-ling? Bob: Yes. What's blue and goes ding-a-ling? Trudy: A blue ding-a-ling? Bob: No, they only come in red.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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