What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

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You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

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How many people of a certain demographic does it take to change a light bulb? x+1 (x >0), 1 person to change the lightbulb and x to behave in a manner consistent with the established stereotype of said demographic.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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A seal walks into a club.

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belly button

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An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

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Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

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Shea's sty....

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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,Do you know what hapened to the janitor who cleaned the school halls? He finished the job, got paid a reasonable amount and went home to his average family.

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Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

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why didnt the girl laugh at the joke? because it wasnt funny

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whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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