what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

how do you get a clown off a swing i dont know but dont call suzy

You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

A christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walked into a bar... Then the Muslim shoots the Jew and blows himself up.

REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REDD REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED................................that is all LOL

Knock, knock! Who's there? your enemy your enemy who? your nemesis who was brutally raped and murdered last nigh.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

A bear and a furry bunny rabbit were in the woods. The bear ate the rabbit..

If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

010010101210001010 You dirty girl

What did the pineapple say to the orange? Nothing; Neither a pineapple nor an orange contains the necessary muscles to produce speech.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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