-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

the midget went to the midget store

Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

Why did the blonde blow up? She ate a bomb.

I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

A guy asks someone's name. The other guy answer that his name is Steeve.

your momma is so stupid shes fricken retarded

What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

What did the Asian, the black man and the jew have in common? To be honest i really don't know.

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

What is both bold and brash? Fox

whos district champs not JM

What's worse than finding a dead fly in your soup? Finding your soup in a dead fly

Just admit it. one time in ur life u pretended that the floor was lava and the only way to survive was on the couch.

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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