What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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What's white and black and lives in the ghetto : a panda bear

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: He wasn't, it turns out 7 was afraid of 6 because 6 beat 7 up in high school

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Robin get in the batmobile!

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Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

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whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops