Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the bot get for his birthday? .. men!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

96 there mad at each other instead its 69

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: How do you stop a hijacked plane? A: The plane can't be hijacked because the pilots cabin is not accessable until the plane lands.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops