Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

Q: Why couldnt the kid feel his legs A: He had no arms

Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was white

If Selfish Sam has twelve cookies and Tricky Todd asks for three then how many cookies does sam have left? Twelve. Remember he's selfish

LA Police, Christine Collins called. She wants her son back.

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

How do you get pikachu onto a bus? You can't. Pikachu is a fictional creature and therefore does not exist.

Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

Wanna see me count to ten? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

yada yada

yolo your orange looks orange

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing you mum having ***

Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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