What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

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What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

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What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

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What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

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Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

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A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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