How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

Whats pink and slippery? A pink slipper.

Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

If life gives you AIDs, make lemonaids.

Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

why doesn't anyone like reed? who cares, no one likes reed

What did the little girl who's parents died in a car accident get you her birthday? Foster Parents

What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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