Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

What is worse than finding your parents dead? You being charged for the crime.

Because she has down's syndrome

What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 2,091,029,203,284,485,389,684,564,345,089,859,849,485,374,094,394,584,584.00002394832323945834958349234854343432323343534342323243543534234358394564023285409564053942304923049234 x 10 to the 1234543565342312323560845834034th power divided by 0.

What happened to Dave when he walked across the road? He got hit by a car and died... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Dave...

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? I just said it was Steve

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

A blonde walks into a bar ouch

What is meant by the term 'Biological control''? Not ending up on the Jeremy Kyle Show.

What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

Once upon a time, The end.

What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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