The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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how did Andrew meet adele He was working as a stableboy

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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Man U

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins the china town

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poop.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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