What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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a jew walks out of a furnace

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Why did the black man pick up a bucket of fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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9/11

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whats white and sticky glue

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roses are red violets are blue i'm not a? poet microwave

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen Property.

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

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Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

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Women's Rights

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Basically copying you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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