Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

A:Hi, do you like to blow bubbles? B:Yea... A:Hi, my names bubbles

Knock Knock. Knockin on Heavens door, oh hey come in

What's the funniest thing about the holocaust? Nothing it wasn't a joke

Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

My friend told me to jump right off a cliff That's impossible since this cliff goes left...

What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

whats worst then dieng in a videogame

Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

George Bush, a little boy, and his grandfather are on an airplane with a failing engine. They have only two parachutes to save themselves. The plane crashes and they all die.

What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...