You suck big fat slobber

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

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This joke is the worst joke ever.

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penis haha

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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Did you hear about the guy who did a backflip off the cliff? He died

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops