yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

What's green and blue? yellow

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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