What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

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What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

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I'm 4 and what is this?

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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Why did the black man get lynched? Because he committed eight murders and six double homicides, and the judge wanted him dead...

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what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

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so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

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Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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My wife made me a sandwich

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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