- Anti Joke

What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

Face...the other white meat!

What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

You were born.

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. A.Knock knock B. Who's there? A.Not Susie

How do you get a chicken to cross the road? Get him in the other side

What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

Minecraft.

Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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