What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

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How many seeds does a watermelon have? None. It is seedless.

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What did the man say to the other man? Hi

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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I'm so full I could stop eating.

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A flight attendant walks up to a black man on a plane. She then asks if he would like anything to drink.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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Whats worse than being a 40 year old virgin? Being a 12 year old girl in Africa who gets raped everyday to feed her family.

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The Female Orgasm

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Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

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A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

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What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

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What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

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-Ask me if i'm a crab. -Are you a crab? -No, why would i be a crab?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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