Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Q: What do you get when you cross an alcoholic and a sex addict? A: A baby

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to severely injure a human.

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the world is made out of 4 things. protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons

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A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

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so david walks into a convenience store and wanted to buy a pack of gum. so he asks the cashier how much is the gum and the cashier said that it is 99 cents and then david said oh no! i thought it was 98 cents.

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Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

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i love to lick...

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Sammi suck kyles chode

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops