What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

Obama

It's easy to take part, just type your text below! no

Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

why are you reading this? You are bored out of your mind and don't want to do you're homework. and now that you read this, you will realize what you're doing and will now get back to work.

heres a funny joke your momas so fat............

why can stevie wonder drive? He's blind

Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

Patty cake. Which was a pretty funny catchthingie.

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Wait what? I did not type that!

What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

whats small and sexually confused? YOu

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at him.

Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

I thoroughly dislike arabs, I lost both my parents in the events of 9/11.

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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