- Anti Joke

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't stab you 17 times in the kidney?

When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

Q: Who showed up at the dead soldier's funeral? A The Westboro Baptist Church...

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because there were no cars coming

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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