what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he was to busy watching porn. And then was hit by a truck.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

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dry handjob

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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Q:What do you call a black man flying a plane? A: An over-used anti-joke

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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Women's rights

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Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

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A black man breaks into a car, he doesn't steal anything because that would a violation of the car owner's privacy.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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