How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Oh, I was just asking.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

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Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

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what is blue purple and has wings what i dont know that why i am asking you

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What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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