Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

My mum is called Steve

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You suck big fat slobber

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a horse walks into a blender ow

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A woman went outside for some fresh air.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down +2

YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does Courtney smell? she has a severe lack of personal hygiene which needs addressing,

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops