Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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i have an apple. now suck my dick

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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