A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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Why can't Kim and Arnold get childern ? because they are 2 stones.

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3.14159365358979323846264

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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FUCK THE JEWS

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1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

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why wouldn't the printer work? because there was an animal in it.

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Whats worse than dropping your apple? The Japanese earthquake!

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What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

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"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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