Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

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What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

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girls basketball

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Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the car? Get in the car.

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What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

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yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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