Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

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I'm Jewish

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,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

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A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

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Cancer.

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

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I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

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Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

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A YouTube brawl began between two gentlemen in the comment section. They agreed to a final answer and moved on.

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

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Can i have a Ice Cream Kuhn?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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