What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

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why was the boy crying he had cancer

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Knock knock! Who's there? The doorbell wasn't working.

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door.

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

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What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

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What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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