Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

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Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

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Why was the 18 year old white male late for his college class. On his way to college he got in a car accident and killed 5 people and he walked away unharmed

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

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If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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Dont read this joke

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How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

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A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

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Okay, yeah red, but you wont ever get to see it because you have gone stale.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

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Knock knock... Whose there? Patrick Oh hey, come in...

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Do you play piano? No

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

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poop nuff said

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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