A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

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What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

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Yo momma is so ugly, that she has no mirrors in her home to avoid the feeling of disgust and sadness she gets whenever she sees her reflexion

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What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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Dear God, That wasn't cool. Seriously. From, Japan

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A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

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Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

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What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

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two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

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Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

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Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

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I'm hungry.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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