Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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What did the black guy who was lost in Syria say? "Where am I?"

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Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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I dont hate you Lets just say if you were on fire and i had water id drink it

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Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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Caca.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? On a fundamental level, it was pursuing evolutionary instincts, perhaps a half-bored interest in food.

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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