What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Woman's Rights

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

Roses are red violets are blue..... I have normal vision

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

What's worse than the holocaust? Giovanna Plowman.

So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

Dead on Aodhan your breaking te ten commandments by lying you jew you dont believe in the divinity of Christ.

Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

Knock Knock (No response) Knock knock (No response)

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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