If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

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Is your plant made out of Osmium, Molybdenum, Silicon and Sulfur? Because it's going through OsMoSiS. That was just a joke, not a pick up line. Unless I was giving a pick-up line to your plant, which I definitely wasn't...

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Peter

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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69

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What's better than winning $5000 a week for life?! Winning any larger sum of money a week for life, and sex.

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Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

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Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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What do you call a man with no head? Nothing he has no ears.

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Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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