what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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which one is easiest

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says, "I'm Japanese!" The second man says, "I'm Japanese too!" The bartender says, "I'm also Japanese!" The bar was in Japan.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

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How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

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Butt poop.

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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Why was the little boy crying He had a frog stapled to his head

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How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

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-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

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A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

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What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

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Why did the girl fall of her chair? The chair can only hold so much weight.

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

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Knock knock who's there I killed your family

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops