An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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You just read this ..

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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hello juliano and guss. having fun?

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Jinoo walks into a club it's not a club anymore it's a slaying factory

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

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Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

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#Cutforbieber - Cole g.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

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whos gay rusty kohlen hit him up on facebook!

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What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops