What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The elephant and the mouse was gonna go swimming at the lake, but they realize the Elephant forgot his swimming trunks! Mouse: Do you really need two trunks? Elephant: Oh well I can do with this one... but its not a swimming trunk! Mouse: Huh? Moral: Huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do Native Americans own Casinos? Because it's a very profitable business situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A sober Amy Winehouse

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man stand's on a chair Then he fall's off

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops