If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Why did the young man not want to go to school? Because he had a large tumor on the left side of his face.

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Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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What do cows and grass have in common? They both say "moo", except for the grass.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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