A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

7

How do you make a blond shut up? Staple her tongue to the roof of her mouth and super-glue her lips together.

What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

What has a bomb straped to itself and has wheels? Me. I lied about the wheels.

you...

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

what do u call a black person by his name

the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a bus.

what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

Papa Smurf: Why did the chicken cross the road? Grouchy Smurf: I hate chickens!

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

Whats the best part about being alive? Not getting hit by a bus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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